By creating corporate loopholes for companies that put chains in the way of EVERYTHING.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By signing a bill into law that makes grills extra slippery.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By SOMEHOW allowing cookies to get bigger than the glasses they are meant to be dunked in.

By SOMEHOW allowing cookies to get bigger than the glasses they are meant to be dunked in.By outsourcing hat factories, thus preventing the production of quality hats.
 
26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By instituting a ban on electric pencil sharpeners, resulting in a deformed pencil epidemic.

By instituting a ban on electric pencil sharpeners, resulting in a deformed pencil epidemic.
By putting banana peels on fashion runways.
 
26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By continuing conflict not only in the Middle East, but also with the d-bag neighbors from across the street.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By forcing all slurpees to resemble the horrible, sad, disappointing bottom slurpee section.

By forcing all slurpees to resemble the horrible, sad, disappointing bottom slurpee section.
 
By allowing good ol' fashion American trays to be replaced by these wonky Chinese ones.
 
26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By refusing to acknowledge our country's very serious soda rolling problem.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By turning a blind eye to the very real danger that is ice cream that's frozen too hard.

By turning a blind eye to the very real danger that is ice cream that's frozen too hard.
 
By making it much harder to kick a sign when you're just feelin' a little peeved.
 
26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By conspiring with the liberals in congress to make all sandwiches land face down in the worst situations.

By conspiring with the liberals in congress to make all sandwiches land face down in the worst situations.

By cutting back funding on the nation's superhero initiative, thus leaving the role of Spiderman to this bumbling idiot.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By forcing this dude to eat his facial hair.

By forcing this dude to eat his facial hair.

By imposing a new big government regulation to shrink the size of dominoes, resulting in tragedies like this.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By changing the Earth's gravitational field, thus making it much more difficult to execute a successful backflip.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By giving you all the bad letters in Scrabble.

By giving you all the bad letters in Scrabble.
 
By making the snow in the Arctic regions extra cold, just to screw around with some poor polar bears.
 
26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By thinking its somehow okay to get a bunch of bees drunk before they have to go to work at the hive.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By thinking its somehow okay to get a bunch of bees drunk before they have to go to work at the hive.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By telepathically giving this child a horrible haircut, thus setting him up for ridicule.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By glueing this poor drummer's music sheets together "just for a giggle."

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By refusing to acknowledge the pain and suffering our nation's tape users go through each day.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

By forcing good, hardworking Americans into carrying all their cleaning supplies at once.

26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country

And by hanging out with Tom Hanks and not inviting me.